The Myth Of Being Ready

If I always waited until I was ready for change or ready to do something, then the truth is, I would still be in active addiction.

Something that I learned from Steven Pressfield's book "The War of Art" is that sometimes, we just need to go for it. The book talks a lot about resistance, things holding us back. One of my favourite takeaways from the book is that if we want to write something, all we need to do is sit down and write it. We don't need to figure out what the person on the other end wants to read. We don't need to figure out what our end goal is. We don't need to figure out where it's going to go. We don't need to wait for inspiration to come to us. All we need to do is sit down and write.

I carried perfectionism with me through my active addiction and especially through schooling. I studied to get 100s. Not to pass, but to get the best possible score I could, a perfect score. In school, we were encouraged to do this. In the real world, especially in the creative world, this doesn't really work as much. My sobriety isn't perfect. My writing isn't perfect. My idea for my peer support group isn't perfect. My daily posts aren't perfect.

If I waited for any of these things to be perfect, then I wouldn't have any of it. For so long, I wanted to start a blog. I wanted to start sharing my experience through writing, but there was a problem. I wasn't a writer. I had never really learned how to write in a formal way. I kept doubting myself. I kept doubting my abilities. It kept delaying the start of me wanting to do what felt true to me, to write this blog.

Eventually, I surrendered the outcome and realized that I didn't need to be perfect and I started to write. That was the birth of this blog, If You're Reading This. It has been one of the best and most therapeutic things I've done in my recovery. It has allowed me to share my experience with others. It has allowed me to reflect. It has allowed me to put my experiences and thoughts into writing. All of that, and I almost didn't go through with it because I "wasn't a writer".

If I didn't adopt this idea of "go for it", then not only would I not be sober, but I wouldn't have this blog, I wouldn't have my peer support group, I wouldn't have my social media and so much more. I have an idea that I want to do and I just go for it. Sure, I put a little bit of planning into it, but I don’t wait until I get all of the ideas perfect in order to go through with it.

These ideas all boil into one word: ACTION. I learned that I needed to take action in my life to start doing things differently because if nothing changes, then nothing changes. For so long, I wished for a different life. I was hoping that a miracle would happen. It never did. I went to treatment to get sober, yes, but I mainly went to treatment because I needed to learn how to accept help, how to take a suggestion. I had no problem asking for help or talking about the things I was struggling with, I had trouble implementing any of the things that people suggested to me into my life. I would go to therapy, tell them what I was dealing with and then continue to do the same behaviours throughout the week until I saw the therapist again. Now, I take action in my life. I do the opposite of what I did in my active addiction. If there is something that I want to change, I take the steps to change it. If there is something I want to do, I do what I need to do to get it done.

I’ve heard so many people say “I’m not ready” or “I’ll do it when I’m ready.” Honestly, this brings up a sadness within me because I know that if I still lived my life this way, then I would not be where I am today.

I don't write to give advice. Unsolicited advice is something that I've learned that I don't want to be part of me sharing my message. I write in hopes that others see something in my experience that can work for you. I write in first person because this is my experience. I don't know if what worked for me will work for you, but I do know that when I heard other people's stories, I was able to resonate with some of them and tried to implement it into my life.